Siblings Fighting – Snow

Dear Losing it,

Bull makes me laugh! What she says is funny, but oh so true! Our children are miniature versions of us who lack refinement.

My girls fight everyday. Mostly, the oldest corrects the youngest… the youngest pesters the oldest… the oldest corrects the youngest… the youngest pesters the oldest. You get the picture. It is a vicious cycle. It is easy for me to be one of two extremes: hypersensitive to it, or completely ignore it. To be quite honest, this is an area where my consistency lacks!

When I am on my “A” game, these are some things I have found to be effective:

• Stop it as soon as it starts
• Point out the environment they are creating in our home. I often ask them how they would feel if their daddy & I spoke to each other that way? They always say it would stress them out… and that’s the point! It stresses people out, so take that into consideration!
• Make them stop and serve one another… When they do that, their attitude is always terrible to begin with, but then it turns around. I typically have them clean each others’ rooms.
• A year or so ago, we used a thankfulness notebook. Anytime there was hatefulness happening, they would have to write something in their notebook about their sister that they liked, but it couldn’t be superficial. It had to be a character trait or a gift they saw in the other. It was hard but good!

I think siblings fight in order to learn how to get along. Wish it was easier on us as parents, but I have hope that eventually it will bring about peaceful and loving relationships for them!

Grace & Peace,
Snow